Processing

Do you ever look around, feel like something is different, and respond by assuming it is everyone else who has changed? Yeah. I confess guilty as charged.

Lately the air has shifted into wondrous spring weather and with it a movement inside of me. But instead of running to God and trying to figure it out, I allowed myself to get swept up in the emotions of a spiritual season shift. The swells of change began to overwhelm me, and then convince me that the culprit of this confusion was indeed everyone else.

Thank the Lord for His Word! I read the beautiful chapter of Hebrews 4 concerning rest and our inheritance if we walk in obedience. God will pour out rest on our soul when we surrender and allow Him to have His way. The Word illuminates our heart, piercing between what is flesh and spirit, which reveals to us how much unrest dwells in us. Salvation is not about work, but about rest. So this means the places in my soul that are full of anything but rest are actually inhabited by disobedience and striving. Ouch!

Lately I have been trying to do the same things I always do while in prayer (specifically intercession) yet in the place that I normally meet the Holy Spirit, He seems to have vanished. I have found myself questioning the methods of intercession (again looking outward rather than inward) instead of questioning the status of my heart. The Spirit is not gone, He is just leading me into the place of rest. This means no striving, no working and no toiling. It means sitting with God, letting Him love me, and totally throwing my ability to pray out the window.

Sometimes it takes me awhile to catch on to what He is doing in me. I need to learn not to assume it is everyone else who is all of the sudden behaving oddly, but rather something in me that is different! I am not sure what my new season of rest looks like yet, but I imagine it really is all about my internal status. I thought of ditching all my intercession sets and changing my prayer room schedule (you know, new season new schedule, right?) But I don’t think that is the point nor the important factor. I must learn to exist in my surroundings during every season of the soul and not alter my life to bring comfort to my newest revelation of truth.

So, all this to end with the point that I am changing and it is good. The Lord has set my life up in a beautiful way for rest to be easily accessible. Now I just have to make the choice to live in it, rather than just trying to tap into when it occurs to me that I am a bit out of touch…